Though we hate to admit it, as men, we sometimes get hurt when a guy leaves us!
So for all the guys out there, here are some effective tips to get over a breakup from a girl you really loved:
Give yourself time.
It’s a terrible thing to go through a rough breakup. It would be nice if there was some way to force yourself to pick up and move on at the drop of a hat, but that’s just not how people work. Like it or not, you’re going to need time to heal.
This guide can only help guide the healing and hasten it somewhat. It can’t reduce the time you’ll need beyond a certain amount.
Use your personal space.
Maybe you own a home; maybe you only have half a bedroom to call your own. Whatever the case, find times and places where you can be alone with your thoughts, and let them come naturally. When you have personal space, you have no restrictions on your thoughts. Knowing you have a place where you can be totally honest with yourself will help you cope with your anger and sadness in other areas of your life.
- If you don’t have any useful space at home, try visiting a nearby park or schoolyard at a time when few other people are using it. Find an out-of-the-way corner and stay there for a while.
- If your personal space reminds you of your ex-girlfriend, rearrange it. Take down and hide anything that reminds you of your time together, and give the whole area a fresh look by moving furniture, changing decorations, or donating/selling extra stuff.
- Consider meditation during your personal time, to help you sort things out in your head. There are various meditation methods; the most basic is to sit and breathe evenly, focusing on the physical sensation of your own body, until your thoughts become clearer and less overwhelming.
Resist the temptation to call.
Especially after longer-term relationships, the urge to get back in touch with your ex can be overwhelming. Do your very best to resist it; it will only make things worse in the long run.
- Try keeping a tally of all the times you start to get in touch with your ex-girlfriend. The act of keeping track will remind you to stop.
- If your ex is the one getting in touch with you, things become more complicated. It’s best to avoid her as much as possible if you can. Try to explain to her that you need more time to get over her. If she still cares at all, she’ll do her best to respect your wishes.
- If she doesn’t seem to be respecting your request, don’t be too angry with her. It usually means she is suffering almost as much as you are, and simply lacks your self-discipline.
Write down your hopes and interests.
Whenever you’re feeling self-possessed enough that you don’t need to vent in your writing, try listing your talents, hobbies, interests, ambitions, and dreams. You’ll be reminded of how much else there is in your life aside from your ex.
- Organize these items however you want. Try ordered lists, or just draw a big web of connected ideas.
- Every time you hit on something that really excites or interests you, take special note of it. You have the time and freedom to pursue these things again, now that you’re single.