When death occurs and we have to prepare for the funeral, it’s when one realizes that it is a very interesting ceremony in African society. Burial is one of the most chaotic things one will ever do, as it was witnessed during Ken Okoth’s memorial service. People become really horrible; you grieve and fight at the same time.
Allowing yourself to talk about grief is very important; bottling up feelings becomes very risky and that is how depression comes about. Grief comes with a lot of psychological changes and people respond to it differently. People may also not understand how to support you at that time and that is okay.
People don’t realise how alone mourners are until they grieve; it is not like people do not care they are caught up in their own lives. The best way to support someone is through supporting all the other elements of their life; do not just come and spend time talking about the dead. You do not support those grieving by going there, acting sad and crying.
For people grieving on a loss of a loved one, there is nothing as annoying as making some certain statements, it would be best if you kept silent when you visited them than hearing ‘It is God’s plan, be strong.’
People grieve differently, but most of us live in denial, always hoping for a chance that there may be a mistake, I lost my brother but a part of me still hopes that we buried the wrong body. Coming to terms with loss is a process, proper grieving is a process.
— Brian Oketch Amwai 🇰🇪 (@AmwaiBrian) August 2, 2019
We have all lost someone we loved and we grieved in the best way known to us. It would be best if everyone respected people’s way of choosing to mourn their loved one.
On George Ikua upon losing his beloved wife Janet, claimed the hardest part is to deal with clothes loved ones leave behind when they pass on. ‘I am still struggling with it,’ George said.
Indeed, Kenyans agree that dealing with feelings, emotions and grief when you’re sober is hard.
