It is said that the youth are the hope and future. I wonder how many people understand this statement. The society in itself has created many boundaries for this statement to be well articulated. Have you tried taking to that youth in the streets and asked them how they are doing? No.
You honestly have no idea what they are battling with. Thepressure fro left, right and center is real. Saying that you’ll feel pressure from society to do certain things in your 20s is an understatement. By succumbing to these pressures, you may end up having to correct mistakes that could’ve been avoided in the first place.
Ignoring the advice, and following your own head and heart, may be the only way to keep yourself happy. Save yourself some misery:
1. “Marry and have kids before you are 30s.”
Wait a minute? Where did all this come from? Is 30 a measure of success or something? The truth is this may work for those established in a relationship and career in their early twenties. For most of us, this isn’t the case. Relationships take time. So do careers.
The constant questions of ‘When are you having babies? despite the fact that you’re still in college, and single, can become frustrating. If you want to become well-established in your career before you marry, go for it. If that means you’re 34 when you get married, who cares? If you don’t want to get married at all, don’t. If you don’t want a career, then don’t have one. Do what makes you happy.
2. “Do a Course that will make you the most money.”
Kenyans love making some good cash, most people in the world do. It’s important to have some good cash on you, it’s the reason why some of us still report to work every other day. When you come to the point of picking your course in college/campus, there will be plenty of individuals ready and willing to tell you just what you should do.
Many will helpfully suggest that you go into the medical field for the guaranteed government jobs, or do some accounting for the healthy income. Usually, they will suggest this despite the fact that you get sick at the sight of blood and hate math. For those who actually ask you what you want to do, you may be met with a disappointed expression when you excitedly tell them about your interest in art.
Granted, money is important. You must be able to pay your bills. However, so is your happiness. If you can do a job that you love, and pay your bills, you have all that you need from a career. Sure, you can pick the major that will get you much income and less working hours a week for the rest of your life. If you love it, that’s great. If you’re miserable every day of your life, it’s not worth it.
3. “Leave your high school sweetheart.”
Plenty of people will always doubt your ability to really “know what you want,” considering the fact that you haven’t “tested the waters,” among other clichés. The most important questions you should be asking yourself is; Do you love your high school sweetheart? Can the two of you work through problems efficiently? Do the two of you encourage and support each other? Stay with them. Learning this lesson the hard way was one of the most devastating mistakes I’ve made. If you are happy, in love, and where you want to be. Stay with them.
4. “Maintain friendships with your childhood best friends because they’ll always be there.”
It’s true, the friends you grow up with know you the best. They’ve been through everything with you, you went to Primary School together, probably High School too. There is no reason not to appreciate that for the rest of your life. However, people change. There’s no manual to living life.
That childhood bestie may grow up to be a self-centered individual, who could actually care less about you and your problems. Drop them. They will weigh you down. Your childhood best friend may grow up to have the same interests as you, but a different social circle. If you drift apart for a few years, it’s okay.
If your friendship is healthy and fulfilling, stick with it. If not, you will make new friends who will probably share your current interests and accept your current lifestyle. These friends can be just as, if not more, rewarding than those you’ve had your whole life.
5. “You need to move away to discover yourself.”
Some youth their twenties have been in the same place their entire life and are dying to get out. They move away, become liberated, and discover who they truly are. We’ve all seen it. Good for them. Some people try it, head down a miserable path, and end up right back home. That’s okay, too.
Being in your 20s doesn’t make you mute to your own wants. Your head and heart are perfectly capable of functioning and carrying out the decision making process. Think the well-intentioned opinionates for their time and consideration. Learn what you can from their mistakes. Then, pay attention to yourself.