In Kenya, rarely do you hear of divorces unless from the new generation breed. Older couples tend to stick to their marriages unless otherwise.
Often we find that these couples rushed into marriage without knowing what it takes to be in one.
All marriages are impacted by marital problems. Marital problems cause couples to seek a divorce on a daily basis. Whether or not a marriage survives when a problem hits depends on the problem and how a couple decides to deal with that problem.
1. Money problems
Most couples argue over bills, debt, spending, and other financial issues. How you decide to deal with money problems in your marriage will determine whether those problems have a negative or positive effect on your marriage.
2. Children
A child is the number one stressor in a marriage and can accentuate differences in beliefs on issues like how to discipline, who is responsible for most of the childcare or what educational options to choose from.
3. Sex
Frequency, quantity, quality, and infidelity are all common sources of stress and disharmony in a marriage. Withholding sex to punish a spouse, breaks the marital bond. Cheating on a spouse destroys trust.
4. Friends
Not all friends are helpful to relationships some of them are toxic. Be sure you know the difference between a friend who will enhance your relationship and one who will break it down.
5. Family
In-laws, siblings, children and step-children can all create stress within a marriage. When coping with negative issues because of the family be smart about it.
6. Expectations
We all go into marriage with certain expectations. Most of the time, marriage is the opposite of what we expected. We romanticize marriage and become disillusioned once those romantic expectations aren’t met. Unmet expectations are a major source of conflict in marriages.
7. Personality conflicts
Is your personality ruining your marriage? There are personality traits that can doom a marriage to failure. Are you a conflict avoider? Do you like to “one-up your spouse? Do you bend over backwards to please your spouse, neglecting your needs in the process? If you answered yes to any of these, you need to work on changes these negative personality traits.
Each of the above is a very common problem dealt with in a marriage. Although they are problems, they can also be opportunities for growth, learning, and accord. Whether these issues remain problems causing stress in your marriage or become an opportunity for growth is up to you.