Do you look at other people’s lives and compare them to your own? Does this make you question whether you are smart, fit or happy enough?
If so, then you may be a perfectionist: a person who strives for flawlessness, for a perfect creation, outcome or performance … They find it difficult to delegate, even if that means neglecting their health, relationships and wellbeing in pursuit of a ‘perfect’ outcome.
And in that regard, society is a perfectionist. The desire to be perfect seems to influence thinking from a young age.
Perfectionism can have serious implications: it’s been linked to anxiety and depression, and the health and happiness of young women is a growing concern.
Perfection is something that largely affects women. A US survey in 2009 found that women are also more likely than men to experience feelings of inadequacy at home and at work, and a larger proportion felt they failed to meet their own high standards and that of the society.
The pressure to be perfect also extended to the workplace, with many respondents talking about feeling inadequate at their jobs or experiencing impostor syndrome. They also complained of feeling the pressure to have it all: juggling being a mother with career and other personal pressures.
Social media has a big role to play in influencing women’s outlook on this issue. White skinny women with long noses are considered ‘perfect’ by society standards whereas the thick, curvy and mostly black women are seen as substandard if not unhealthy.
Yes, it’s possible to be overweight and healthy.
There’s nothing wrong with being overweight
Does this statement wrinkle your brain? Well, it’s not surprising. We receive the message that ‘overweight = bad’ loudly and clearly every day, whether implicitly, through a lack of positive fat characters in TV shows, or explicitly, through negative messages from the diet industry.
Plus size women are beautiful,the problem is the society works so hard to define what beautiful really is – @NeomiNganga #MorningliveKE pic.twitter.com/PNfcmsI32I
— Switch TV Kenya (@switchtvkenya) May 22, 2019
Dieting doesn’t always equal weight loss
Only a tiny percentage of people who diet maintain their weight loss even if they maintain the diet. This is a problem, because weight cycling (repeatedly losing and regaining weight) can put serious strain on the body.
You can’t figure out how healthy someone is by looking at them
It’s possible for someone to be overweight and healthy, just as it’s possible for someone to be thin and unhealthy. Good health is a result of our behaviours. Eating well, exercising and having a positive outlook is good for all of us, regardless of our size.
The philosophy behind ‘health at every size’
‘Health at every size’ recognises that healthy living and personal wellbeing are what’s important, not weight control. The following are the keys to living a good, healthy life.
Accept other people’s bodies as well as your own
Recognise that we all come in different shapes and sizes, and that all people are inherently valuable regardless of the way they look. Once you stop criticising other people’s bodies, you’ll find it much easier to accept your own.
Don’t worry about your weight or clothing size
Appreciate the body you have, be thankful for everything it’s capable of, and feel excited by its potential. It’s much easier to take care of your wellbeing when you think about yourself positively.
Trust yourself
Some people believe that if they stop dieting and counting calories, they’ll snap and stuff their face with cake all day long. But our bodies are invested in keeping us alive; even if you did try to eat cake for every meal, after a day or two you’d have a hardcore craving for some vegetables.
- Eat when you’re hungry.
- Eat slowly, and really taste your food.
- Stop eating when you start to feel full.
- Keep food interesting by eating a variety of things.
- Give new, healthy foods a chance.
Find a form of movement that you enjoy
Just as controlling what you eat just to lose weight takes the fun out of eating, exercising out of obligation is a massive drag. Find an exercise that makes you feel good. Take your dog for a walk, ride your bike somewhere new or go out dancing. Pro tip: jump rope and games of bullrush never stop being fun!
Don’t let your body hold you back
Here’s a revolutionary message: have fun, eat good food and be happy. That goes for everyone, big or small. When you think about it, it’s crazy that our physical appearance is held in such high regard when it’s so boring compared to the myriad ways that make us awesome.