Breakups are as unanimously terrible as Game of Thrones memes, but if there’s one redeeming quality they have, it’s that they tend to follow a pattern. First, you weep. Then, you lose 20 kilos. Eventually, you bargain, but once you realize that’s futile and you’re better off without the sad sack, you proceed to Step Four, dividing up your stuff so you can move out and move on.
It’s easy to do this with furniture, books and records, but when it comes to shared pets, the process isn’t so simple. You can’t just bisect the beloved chiwawa or the bushy cat you co-parented harmoniously for years like you can a cutlery set, so, what do you do?
Oftentimes, the only solution is the pet custody battle; a rumpus of pain that only climaxes in one, brutal way with a clear winner and loser, only one of which gets to take a victory lap around the loser or may just take the pet and go off the grid like they never existed in the first place. For the loser, the loss of their pet can often be as devastating as the loss of the relationship itself.
This can actually be one of the hardest and emotional parts of a split. For couples who are separating the stakes are so high it’s almost like in addition to losing a partner, you’re losing a child.
