LIKE A PRO! How to properly ‘Ride’ your Man to Ultimate Satisfaction

Its been several years since Ciara’s “Ride” song came out, and ladies, we gotta admit, she had a good point as to what exactly to do a man. Excuse me but…

Don’t look at us like that! We know your type. Three strokes. Stop. Three strokes. Stop.

No.

We have refused! No more mediocrity in your horizon!

Listen, riding dick isn’t easy. Weh. You burn a couple hundred of calories though while at it so it’s up there with cycling, only more fun!

1. Finding a rhythm

You and that dick down there need to be more in sync than your whole squad’s period! Remember you are in control, your wildin and hopin and grindin will not help you if the dick pops out every two strokes. Like, guh!!

2. Use your hands for support

Look, if you can ride dick hands-free, you really shouldn’t be here. But if you are, I just need you to know that it’s okay, encouraged even for you to use your hands as support. You can place them anywhere too, on his chest, gripping his this as you near the homestretch.

3.Whine the waist

Vunja kiuno mama!!

When you are sitting astride your man all fired up, draw from your inner filthy goddess, hear the stars playing in your head and dance darling. It will feel so good for both of you and he is bound to give you a standing ovation..in your vagina!

rihanna dancing GIF
4. If something pops, it’s okay

We are all riding the fossil wave here hun! Things will pop and crack while you’re at it, just adjust your position and keep going! Most guys will take pity on your old people knees and help you along too. Unless you’re fucking a dead fish.

old woman win GIF

Yeees!! Make sure you get you some today!!

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