Many Kenyans who came to Nairobi for the first time have funny stories about how they were promised jobs by con artists. The funniest you thought you heard will be overtaken by a new one on some unsuspecting kenyan.
In some cleverly executed con schemes, it would be a sign of idiocy not to fall into their traps. These men can spot a first timer to the city a kilometre away. If the target happens to covet the ‘rare, unbelievable’ deals, their goose is cooked.
Here are 10 ways how first timers are welcomed to the ‘city in the sun.’
1. Phone ya matope
You are window shopping along luthuli avenue staring at cell phone displays when you’re offered a Sh20,000 phone for Sh6k by a stranger who can smell your Murang’a stupidity a kilometre away. You check the gadget; it’s new and genuine.
Deal concluded, he takes the phone to remove his Sim card, but exchanges it with a dummy whose insides are stashed with matope. He tells you to put it in your pocket to keep off cops!
Some will tell you to board a vehicle as they do business and will tell you this is Nairobi, maintain low profile until you arrive so you can use your phone.
The rest is how shocked you get shocked.
2. Trolley taxi
Makokha from siaya County arrives at Machakos Country Bus station armed with heavy luggage after his cousin secured him a job as a guard. A kanda ya mkono (KYM or porter) offers to carry his luggage without mentioning the charges to railways, but on arriving the bus stage, the porter demands Sh500.
And your “from BS to railways 500!!??
Bargaining is made hard by mean-looking enforcers who appear from thin air a they talk loudly to attract others.
And since your from ocha and you have heard how Nairobians sell your clothes on your body, you cooperate.
3. Fake NGO jobs, (Make 7000 in one week )
This one catches both Nairobians and ocha people. Ni tricky sana hii
So here is how it starts.
A newly-minted graduate applies for a Sh80k salary job with an NGO which shortly informs him that he’s the best candidate despite never attending an interview. And ‘Mwalim’ does not see any problem sending Sh950 as interview fee.
Truly, a fool and his money are soon parted!
5. Money-minting chemicals
Having sold your only cow and leased out half of your land to raise money to take your beloved daughter to college, you feel bold enough to multiply the money after strangers demonstrate how miracles work with chemicals that make Sh1,000 notes from plain paper.
But there is a problem. The special chemical is expensive. You offer to withdraw real money to fund the venture that will ensure you pigisha umaskini kwa ukuta!
6. Fake house agents
You call an agent from a number on a poster on a roadside tree as you need a house, urgently. You pay the rent and two month deposit only to be stopped by the caretaker while moving in with your worldly possessions atop a pickup! The agent and his ‘official receipt’ were fake!
There are many other funny notorious tricks in Nairobi , that we will publish in our next article .
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